Dementia is a group of conditions marked by a decline in cognitive functioning. It can be difficult for family members and friends to know the right things to say, or do, when interacting with someone who has dementia, as the condition can affect their understanding of the conversation. The following are five things that should not be said when interacting with someone with dementia.
1. What's Wrong With You?
This question can be both hurtful and offensive. Dementia is a neurological condition and not something that is an individual's fault. By asking this, it implies that the individual is at fault for their condition. The majority of people with dementia already feel frustrated and self-conscious and this question is likely to make them feel worse.
2. Do You Remember Me?
Though this may seem like a harmless question to ask, it can be quite daunting for someone with dementia. It is likely that the individual will not remember, either due to their condition or due to the fact that they simply do not remember you. This can make them feel embarrassed, anxious, or scared. Instead of asking a question that could potentially evoke these feelings, it is better to start with a statement that acknowledges their condition in a positive manner.
3. You Should Do This or That
People with dementia can still make their own decisions, even if it is on a smaller scale. Giving them the freedom to make their own choices helps to maintain their independence and reinforces their sense of self-worth. It is important to let them take the lead and guide the conversation, instead of trying to tell them what to do or say.
4. That's Not How You Used To Do It
This is can be especially hurtful. As dementia progresses, the individual is likely to do certain activities differently than they used to. It is important to remember that this is not a reflection of their ability or their character, but merely a result of the changes in their brain. It is best to be supportive and accepting of their new way of doing things.
5. I Don't Know What To Say
Though it may seem like an innocent statement, this can be quite upsetting to someone with dementia. It implies that the individual has done something wrong, or that there is something wrong with them. Instead of making this statement, it is better to try to engage in conversation or find a topic that the individual is interested in and try to talk about that.
Conclusion
Interacting with someone with dementia can be a difficult and challenging experience, but it is important to remember to be mindful of their feelings and respect their condition. Attempting to show understanding and support is essential for individuals with dementia, and avoiding these five phrases will help ensure that the conversation is positive and meaningful.